Yep, it's me again. And yep, it's another rant about the posh plebs who are performing incredibly stupidly for my own amusement. That's right, it's time for another Apprentice rant!
Firstly, to the BBC, you claim the show is on for 12 weeks but yet you show the second episode the day after the first? Is this indicative of the way the show will be this year, in that you're packing 12 weeks of douchebags being plebs into a 6 week period? This really has nothing to do with my rant, but I was out Tuesday watching the football & was only made aware of this second episode about 10 minutes before it started!
Ok, so onto the second episode. I was actually looking forward to watching this, as watching dumbasses trying to make beer was bound to be tittilating, especially because you know a cock-up was bound to occur. I wasn't disappointed.
Firstly, one of the boys (Tim) was assigned to be head of the girls (in a non-pervy way) as he piped up after his team had won the last task. You could tell the guy was loving it, as everything the girls said he agreed to. Yep, he changed his mind every single time. He was only after a bit of boob methinks! But if you're going to run a business, the best boss to be is the David Brent friendly boss, as we knoe that works out right...right?
At least his team decided on a brand, flavour and advertising way before the boys who, for some strange reason, had decided on the flavour, name & advertising before the makers had actually ascertained what flavours would work. I have to give the boys their due though, they did get manufacturing straight away whilst the girls couldn't get a simple bit of maths right & had already lost the task before the beer was even made.
It was then onto the big sell where the stupidity really kicked in. At this point, I would like to go back to my previous rant, in which I had a pop at the schoolboy who's never had a job before. If you didn't know that he hadn't ever worked a day in his life, then hopefully this proved it to you. He was like a private schoolboy in a brothel - he wanted to get stuck in but had no clue what he was doing. Then he tried to claim that the other sales guys were misleading the customer - well, I'll let you into a little secret Jason, THATS WHAT SALES IS!!!! Sell the product, make it sexy, even if you talk bollocks about it! Dumb posh pleb.
The boys started off spectacularly stupidly - half headed to St Albans to sell their chocolate orange beer at London prices, then went back to London to sell it at St Albans prices. Surely that should be the other way round? Wait a minute, they are all twats. I forgot that for a moment. You are excused Endeavour. Wait a moment! I also forgot that half the boys attempted to sell casks of beer with absolutely no samples or advertising, and left it to Dracula to think about sucking sheeps dry. The lack of business acumen shown towards businesses was amazing.
Then we got to the girls. they went to the Kent Beer Festival. Which was in a pub. In Hackney. In London. Yep, you read that right. Though, to their credit they did sell well. Then they decided to head to the yuppy area of Richmond to a WINE BAR to sell their beer. Yep, a WINE bar. Surely they should have guessed by the bar type & patrons only drinking WINE that the beer wouldn't help. If in doubt though, pimp off one of the girls to offer sex to drinkers in exchange for them buying drinks. It was cringeworthy.
In the end, somehow the boys won, but then again they did pimp off the beer at a price tramps could afford. I got kind of bored towards the end of this episode, as I was heading out to a quiz night and was trying to make myself look pretty. All I know is that a pleb was fired. Thankfully I didn't see what the next task was, so that leaves me open to some sort of surprise.
Sorry the blog is a bit short today, but I'm tired, cranky, stressed & currently have a shit load of work to get on with. So peace out party people!
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